Hi, I'm Melissa...
Few things make me sadder than a woman not living up to her potential.
Women are so good at putting everyone else first, being wonderful friends, and taking care of their families.
We may put our dreams on hold as we get older because they seem "unrealistic", or because we decide to take a backseat to our partner's career, or because we are raising kids.
We let life happen, and stop taking care of ourselves or fulfilling our desires.
We even tell ourselves that having "me time" is selfish, and we feel guilty for investing in the most important person in our life: YOU!
As a single girl, I had big dreams for my life and was taking steps to accomplish them.
As a college graduate with parents in corporate America, plus an older sister with *two* graduate degrees, network marketing was never on my radar. But after a few years in corporate America, I was miserable, uninspired, and felt like I was going nowhere with my career.
I answered about a dozen "work from home" ads until I found the one that felt like the best fit. I was looking for a stable company and a consumable product that people were already spending money on each month using their household budget.
I also wanted access to a successful mentor in case I got “stuck”. After thinking I could figure it out on my own -- after all, I had gone to college! -- I found myself with just a few retail clients (all of them friends or relatives) and no royalty check.
After having success all through school and thinking that being “book smart” would mean easy-street for me in business, I had to admit that was hardly the case; being a business owner and entrepreneur was new territory for me, and I needed help.
Thankfully, someone in my upline was willing to lock arms with me and show me the way. Because he was already successful and still willing to work with me, I didn’t want to waste his time: I executed the plan he laid out for me, allowed him to hold me accountable, and was able to quit my job in one year--and this was all before social media, ladies!
In 15 months I was earning a 6-figure income. To get to that spot, I had to humble myself and become coachable and teachable, and I’d like to think I’ve remained that way throughout my career.
Women are so good at putting everyone else first, being wonderful friends, and taking care of their families.
We may put our dreams on hold as we get older because they seem "unrealistic", or because we decide to take a backseat to our partner's career, or because we are raising kids.
We let life happen, and stop taking care of ourselves or fulfilling our desires.
We even tell ourselves that having "me time" is selfish, and we feel guilty for investing in the most important person in our life: YOU!
As a single girl, I had big dreams for my life and was taking steps to accomplish them.
As a college graduate with parents in corporate America, plus an older sister with *two* graduate degrees, network marketing was never on my radar. But after a few years in corporate America, I was miserable, uninspired, and felt like I was going nowhere with my career.
I answered about a dozen "work from home" ads until I found the one that felt like the best fit. I was looking for a stable company and a consumable product that people were already spending money on each month using their household budget.
I also wanted access to a successful mentor in case I got “stuck”. After thinking I could figure it out on my own -- after all, I had gone to college! -- I found myself with just a few retail clients (all of them friends or relatives) and no royalty check.
After having success all through school and thinking that being “book smart” would mean easy-street for me in business, I had to admit that was hardly the case; being a business owner and entrepreneur was new territory for me, and I needed help.
Thankfully, someone in my upline was willing to lock arms with me and show me the way. Because he was already successful and still willing to work with me, I didn’t want to waste his time: I executed the plan he laid out for me, allowed him to hold me accountable, and was able to quit my job in one year--and this was all before social media, ladies!
In 15 months I was earning a 6-figure income. To get to that spot, I had to humble myself and become coachable and teachable, and I’d like to think I’ve remained that way throughout my career.
After achieving success in network marketing, I found myself with more time to focus on my personal life. I attracted an incredible partner (online, of course!) and a year later we became engaged...
But when I got married, I quickly put myself on the back-burner so my husband could pursue his career.
Once I had my first baby, I slowly started to lose myself... I had packed away my "dream boards" to make room for a nursery and lost the vision for my future.
By the time I had baby #2, I was unfocused and resentful towards my husband. I wasn't communicating my desires and my hubs was falling short of my expectations...
But when I got married, I quickly put myself on the back-burner so my husband could pursue his career.
Once I had my first baby, I slowly started to lose myself... I had packed away my "dream boards" to make room for a nursery and lost the vision for my future.
By the time I had baby #2, I was unfocused and resentful towards my husband. I wasn't communicating my desires and my hubs was falling short of my expectations...
After years of personal development, attending seminars, and honing my skills as a coach, I knew something had to shift.
We can't change others, but we can change ourselves--how had I forgotten this?
I decided to adopt a different philosophy at home and put myself FIRST.
This was a huge shift for me, because it goes against what's expected of us as moms, and what society (or your MIL!) thinks is "right"...
I mean, what mom puts herself first?
It just screams "selfish!" and "irresponsible"!
But what I found is that when I made ME the priority in my life, I was happier and free of stress.
I could handle what life threw at me. Or who threw UP on me (moms, you feel me!)
And it enabled me to show up as a better wife, mom, friend, and leader.
Here's what putting myself first looked like...
We can't change others, but we can change ourselves--how had I forgotten this?
I decided to adopt a different philosophy at home and put myself FIRST.
This was a huge shift for me, because it goes against what's expected of us as moms, and what society (or your MIL!) thinks is "right"...
I mean, what mom puts herself first?
It just screams "selfish!" and "irresponsible"!
But what I found is that when I made ME the priority in my life, I was happier and free of stress.
I could handle what life threw at me. Or who threw UP on me (moms, you feel me!)
And it enabled me to show up as a better wife, mom, friend, and leader.
Here's what putting myself first looked like...
I decided to take my fitness to the next level by competing in a body building show in 2017. I had already overcome obesity in my early twenties, and wanted to get "bikini-ready" as I approached my 40th birthday. I enrolled my family in the goal, got a coach, signed up for the competition, and spent 4 months training for one of the scariest things I've ever done.
(Can you say itty-bitty-teeny-weeny-sparkly-bikini?)
The amount of discipline required to train for the show, weigh and measure my food, and say "no" to treats and social activities was more than I had ever had to exhibit...
But having a mentor and a group of women that were also training alongside me helped me stick to my guns, and I kept telling myself, "This isn't forever!"
And isn't that how life goes? I didn't have to workout or eat like that for the rest of my life... just a few months!
Pregnancy isn't forever... and at the end, you get a baby!
Launching a business and getting out of the ramp-up phase is intense, but it's not forever... and at the end, you get to live your dream lifestyle!
Whatever the trial is, if you can take 100% responsibility for what got you there, you will get through it, and reap the rewards.
For me, I walked away with 3 medals that day and the first place finish in the novice bikini category. SO WORTH IT!
(Can you say itty-bitty-teeny-weeny-sparkly-bikini?)
The amount of discipline required to train for the show, weigh and measure my food, and say "no" to treats and social activities was more than I had ever had to exhibit...
But having a mentor and a group of women that were also training alongside me helped me stick to my guns, and I kept telling myself, "This isn't forever!"
And isn't that how life goes? I didn't have to workout or eat like that for the rest of my life... just a few months!
Pregnancy isn't forever... and at the end, you get a baby!
Launching a business and getting out of the ramp-up phase is intense, but it's not forever... and at the end, you get to live your dream lifestyle!
Whatever the trial is, if you can take 100% responsibility for what got you there, you will get through it, and reap the rewards.
For me, I walked away with 3 medals that day and the first place finish in the novice bikini category. SO WORTH IT!
The "high" from competing gave me confidence in pursuing another big-a** goal: extended travel abroad with my family.
Traveling to different countries was a long-held dream I had, and by then I knew how to manifest, or make something theoretical become real.
However, I knew that moving a family of four to a different country (with a husband who is also dedicated to his career!) would be tricky, and I had little idea of how it would actually transpire.
But I held onto my intentions, which were to have a remarkable adventure, see the world, and teach my kids about the human condition. Even when my husband didn't see how this would ever work given his office job, I had the faith that it would happen.
Traveling to different countries was a long-held dream I had, and by then I knew how to manifest, or make something theoretical become real.
However, I knew that moving a family of four to a different country (with a husband who is also dedicated to his career!) would be tricky, and I had little idea of how it would actually transpire.
But I held onto my intentions, which were to have a remarkable adventure, see the world, and teach my kids about the human condition. Even when my husband didn't see how this would ever work given his office job, I had the faith that it would happen.
I started taking the bold actions that would need to be done if we were going to move: I read books and blogs about families that were taking gap years. I traveled to Nicaragua to explore the region, meet with expats there, and visit schools. I KonMari'd like it was my job, and started selling our things that we wouldn't need if we were about to leave for extended travel, like large pieces of furniture, exercise items, yard equipment, and tools. To increase my earnings I started taking one-on-one coaching clients, and generated an income that was location independent. Even though we weren't picking up and moving anytime soon, I was taking action and it felt SO GOOD.
About four months later, an opportunity at my husband's company came up in Sri Lanka (I didn't even know where that was!!) and in September 2018 we became expats.
Isn't it amazing how things work out like that? I couldn't have planned it better myself!
About four months later, an opportunity at my husband's company came up in Sri Lanka (I didn't even know where that was!!) and in September 2018 we became expats.
Isn't it amazing how things work out like that? I couldn't have planned it better myself!
Life in Sri Lanka was checking all the boxes for me: I was living abroad, we were having the adventure of a lifetime, and after living through the Easter Sunday bombings I had an understanding of the human condition that has changed me forever.
I am using my incredible experience here to launch my life coaching business to inspire women to live their best lives. I started The Trophies, a free online group that empowers women to take 100% responsibility for improving themselves. We talk about topics personal development, goal-setting, productivity, relationships, and money mindset.
I found that many women in the group are married moms who are going through the same struggles I experienced early on in my marriage, so I created Husband Rehab to help them single-handedly improve their relationships.
That's what taking 100% responsibility for your life looks like: you get to be in the driver's seat to take yourself where you want to go, no matter your current situation. Isn't that empowering?
I am using my incredible experience here to launch my life coaching business to inspire women to live their best lives. I started The Trophies, a free online group that empowers women to take 100% responsibility for improving themselves. We talk about topics personal development, goal-setting, productivity, relationships, and money mindset.
I found that many women in the group are married moms who are going through the same struggles I experienced early on in my marriage, so I created Husband Rehab to help them single-handedly improve their relationships.
That's what taking 100% responsibility for your life looks like: you get to be in the driver's seat to take yourself where you want to go, no matter your current situation. Isn't that empowering?
My intention for you is to discover your worth, teach you how to make yourself a priority without neglecting your commitments, and inspire you to take on a big-a** goal that will change you.
I'm dedicated to helping women be their best.
New to my coaching? Please download my free Supermom Survival Guide HERE
And since you're such a prize, please join me over in The Trophies, my free Facebook group for women...
And you're welcome to sign up today for a free 20-minute breakthrough session HERE to start tapping into your power -- I'd love to hear what you're up to (and what's holding you back)!
I'm dedicated to helping women be their best.
New to my coaching? Please download my free Supermom Survival Guide HERE
And since you're such a prize, please join me over in The Trophies, my free Facebook group for women...
And you're welcome to sign up today for a free 20-minute breakthrough session HERE to start tapping into your power -- I'd love to hear what you're up to (and what's holding you back)!